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Monday, Oct. 04, 2004 |
9:21 p.m. |
I swear to god that someone up there has a timer that goes off whenever I�m most vulnerable. It�s at that point that Fate decides to chime in and screw with me�.much like what happened to me on Friday.
Today was different. I spent the weekend pretty worried because I had so much work to do, and I felt like I�d been slacking off at my job. Because I felt so freakin sick all weekend, I never really made it in to at least get started.
Well I got to work a little bit early and immediately got to work on all the drawings that I needed to evaluate. My boss seemed genuinely happy to see me, which was a good thing, and he was pretty helpful in helping me decipher everything that I needed to know. Today was a really good day as far as work goes. I got a lot done, and it showed.
It wasn�t until the end of my workday that things started to get crappy. I guess today is the day that my grandfather went into a nursing home. Since I�d spent the whole day working my butt off, I hadn�t really gotten the chance to eat anything, and my brain was fried, so I decided to not go to the gym tonight. I called up my mom to see how moving Grandpa into the home went, as well as to see if she wanted me to stop by.
Of course, she�s already in a foul mood because of her doomsday nature, as well as how negative she is about�.well�.just about everything. I came by her house, and I could immediately tell that things weren�t going to go well. After everything that I said, she�d say, �HUH?!� this nasty/annoying tone because she�s either deaf, or she�s not paying attention to what I�m saying. Then, of course, she moved on to subjects that I don�t want to talk about with her, with her usual, inquisitive�no no�.demanding is a better word�.nature.
I asked when my aunt was going to be stopping by since it�s such a drive for her, and she went off on another militant tangent about my aunt. She started her story with, �Janeen�er Jeanie�� [Jeanie is my aunt�s name, Janeen is mine] just like she ALWAYS does. I�ve put up with it for years, but I�m really really sick of it now. It�s not that hard to think clearly before you speak, and I despise being confused with my loud-mouthed, bossy aunt. I interrupted her with, �Do you do that to her too?� just wondering if I was the only one who has to deal with the constant inability to pronounce the right name. I didn�t ask in a snotty tone. I asked in a sincerely inquisitive way. I seriously want to know if I�m the only one who has to deal with it, or if she does it to her sister, or to anyone else who listens to her talk about us.
Of course, she has to have a hissy fit about me saying something. Of course, it eventually leads to her not listening to me trying to be sincere. Of course, it leads to her standing up, screaming, �I hate you, don�t talk to me again,� and kicking me out of her house.
When I drove home, I thought about if I had gone too far and had set her off. Then I was struck with the most glaringly obvious thought: normal people don�t do this �break up/make up� crap that she does. Normal people don�t tell you that they hate you, then later either pretend like nothing happened or say, �I was angry, I didn�t mean what I said.�
Even if you�re angry, you should be able to control your mouth enough not to form the words �I hate you�. I don�t understand how anyone can get through life with such an explosive temper and still have any friends. God knows if I did that to my friends-or anyone for that matter- people wouldn�t talk to me.
As dramatic as it sounds, I think I�m going to honor her request and not talk to her. I don�t see a point to it anymore. It always leads to the same place no matter how hard I try. It�s past my abilities now.
Maybe if she finally realizes that I�m not interested in encouraging such a crappy attitude anymore, she�ll realize that it�s not me who has the problem as she seems to think.
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