When I was younger, I used to dream that I was a long lost princess, stolen from my reign by the realities of the world. What concern did I have with this world when I had my own world to rule? I loved the daintiness, the regality of princesses. Queens, in my opinion, were too old. Princesses suffered the indignities of lost princes and duty to their kingdom. The goal of a princess was to find a prince. Glamour and privilege blanketed princesses. War was too dirty to soil the bubble-gum thoughts of princesses.
Over the years, I�ve changed my outlook on things. Strangely enough, I find those leading that life rather lazy. Paris Hilton, in my opinion, is a modern-born princess, and her existence is a shameful waste of money.
I find myself aspiring more toward the warrior. Who can�t be envious of internal and external strength? Getting dirty and fighting are part of the job.
I was told a few years ago by some kind of psychic that I was a warrior in my former life. At the time, I turned my nose up at the thought, but now, even if the theories of psychics are bunk, I can feel it in me. I�m ready at a moment�s notice to join a valiant fight, no matter the costs. I like the feeling of being strong. I like being the protector of others. I like fighting for others.
I don�t know if this is a case of destiny creating the person, or the person creating the destiny. Most often, I was told, when I was younger [and still in my princess days] that I appear to be intimidating. Was it my 6� frame? Was it my fierceness? Was it the fact that I bucked what society accepted as �normal�? Whatever the reason was, either I was destined to be the strong person that I am, or I grew into the role based on the perceptions of others.
I don�t know which caused which, but I like the path that I�m on. If I were to die tomorrow, I�d want to be remembered as a person that fought hard against any enemy, internal or external. I�d want people to say, �J was a great person. You�d definitely want her on your side.�
I�d like to think that I�ve done a good job of letting in the good and keeping out the bad for my friends. I�d like to think that they know that I would fight in any way possible for them, if it means telling someone that they are out of line or giving them the strength to do so.
I hope that I�ve done that.
