Ah, the joys of working in an office. I came into work today and tried to log in to my computer, with, of course, no luck. I tried my password several times, checked to see if caps lock was on, asked the other interns if they�d changed my password as a joke.
Nada.
I shrugged it off and logged in under �Guest� so I could get some work done. I was finding that working without network access was very hard, so instead I decided to make a few phone calls to take care of my apartment business, namely setting up my cable modem.
I reach for the phone and its dead.
Um�ok�it can�t be a coincidence that both my phone and my computer are dead, right? I used AC, the Coworker's phone to call the IS department and ask what was up. Of course there is no answer. The IS department never answers their phones. They sit around and play on the internet and play computer games until someone actually tracks them down. I decide that I�ve had enough of this annoying coincidences and I go downstairs. I ask one of the IS people if she has any idea why my phone and computer were shut off.
�Well, I got an email this morning to deactivate you.�
�Well I�m not leaving until this Friday.�
�Oh we�ll you�re going to have to talk to HR about that because I need their verification to reactivate you.�
Alrighty then.
I walk over to HR to ask them exactly why my phone was shut off and the woman in charge of said things says, �Oh you�re here!�
�Yes, of course, there was a mistake of some kind. I�m not leaving until this Friday, August 16th, not last Friday.�
�Oh, hmmm�.that�s funny, I thought it was this past Friday.�
�Nope, this coming up Friday.�
�Oh well I�ll have to check your file to see your departure date.�
�Well, I�m right here and I�m telling you that my departure date is this coming up Friday.�
�Well I�ll still have to check your file.�
For what exactly? To find out who is right? Whatever.
�Oh and I called your house today. You didn�t turn in your badge.�
�Yeah, I know, that�s because I�m still here. I need it.�
�Well, I�ll have to take it until I check your file.�
Ok whatever, HR is useless. Why does she need to check my file? Why doesn�t she just reactivate me? This is stupid.
This weekend was strangely eventful. I haven�t decided if that�s a good thing or bad thing. On Friday, I went to Dave and Buster�s with JG, the No Longer Lost. It was a grand old time. I felt like I was in Vegas. I spent a majority of my time sitting at those machines where you drop tokens down a chute, and they land on a moving platform. The object is to push the tokens off the moving platform and onto the lower platform, thus pushing other tokens off the edge. For every token knocked off the edge, you get 10 tickets. I ended up with over 800 tickets and I didn�t spent that much money, so it was a good deal.
JG and I sat down to have some food and I ordered a Dutch Treat. It was the most basic martini I could find on the menu that wasn�t an appletini or something. I hadn�t ever tried a normal, non fruity, martini.
Well it was disgusting. Actually, I think it was the most disgusting thing I�d ever tasted. I pulled the waitress aside.
�E, I�m not a big fan of this drink. I�ll pay for it, but I don�t want it anymore.�
�Oh, okay, do you want me to leave it on the table?�
�No, I want it out of my sight. It disgusts me looking at it.�
She took it away and a manager credited me for it, so I didn�t have to pay for the horrendous drink. Suddenly there was a huge group of guys walking around wearing �I�m with Dave� T-shirts. In the middle of their crowd was a guy with a huge balloon hat and a T-shirt that said, �I�m Dave.�
Of course with the beer and second drink I ordered, kicking in, I couldn�t resist.
�E,� I pulled the waitress aside again, �What the hell is going on there?�
�Oh, I have no idea. It�s weird though, isn�t it?�
I pulled aside some other guy and asked him if it was a bachelor party.
Indeed it was. JG and I talked about it and decided that it must have been a lame-ass bachelor party if they were at Dave and Buster�s at 10:30 instead of at a strip club. We finished up our snacks and I was about to ask E for the bill when I locked eyes with someone I had hoped never to see again. I pulled poor E aside again.
�E, what�s the name of that bartender?�
�Oh, who? Oh! That guy? Well, he�s actually a barback. His name is P.�
Oh my fuckin God�.
It was P, the Phantom.
I was really hoping to run across Rock, one of my old Captain pals so we could pull P�s ass out into the back and beat the hell out of him. However, I shrugged him off. In all truthfulness, I�m over what happened with him. It doesn�t bother me anymore. I think that I scare him now more than he scares me, but I still wanna kick his ass. He walked by, carrying a bunch of beer bottles and locked eyes with me.
I think he remembered me.
We exited the dining area and I picked up another Heineken. The bartender recognized me from my old D&B days as �Glitter�. We chatted for awhile and I continued back to my Vegas addiction.
Well lo and behold�.
The guy that I had pulled aside to ask if the huge group of guys was indeed a bachelor party walked by and started talking to me.
I had a huge pile of tickets on the floor next to me.
�So, have you been playing that long?�
�Oh, no, not really.�
�Oh, so how long have you been here?�
�Since about 8.�
�Oh, you�ve been here longer than me.�
�Yeah.�
�I�m from Windsor. My sister is the bride.�
�Oh, fun stuff.�
I excursed myself and walked back to the bar. That poor guy. He actually used that �been here long?� pickup line. You have to feel sorry for someone like that. I really didn�t feel like someone following me around though, so I somewhat ignored his stalker-esque following of me as I walked around the Midway. He walked up to me again.
�Which games should I play?�
�I dunno, I only play the games where I get tickets,� and walked over to a Cyclone machine.
�Oh, how to you play this one?�
�You slide your card, then you try to get the light caught between these two bridges.�
�Oh, ok.�
Yeah, that was it. I walked away again. I finished out my card and told JG that I was ready to go because I wasn�t sure I could take another moment talking to Bachelor Party Guy. We left and went over to the local diner to talk for awhile. Not much else happened actually.
Well, Saturday morning I was woken up at 6:30 in the morning by a phone call and my mom busted into my room.
�She died.�
My stepfather�s mother had finally passed away. It was peaceful and he�d had the entire week to spend with her. Since we all knew that it was coming, I guess it worked out to be the best possible situation. He changed his flight so that he could stay another week with his father to take care of �things�.
The weirdest part about this is this though:
Trouble, my mother�s cat, hasn�t been eating. However, on Saturday morning he sat by the stand that holds the phone and just cried and cried and cried. Finally, 6:30 rolls around, and the phone rings. He grows quiet. My mom gets the news that my step-grandmother had died. Trouble rubs up against her ankles and immediately goes over to the food bowl and starts eating. He doesn�t stop until he finishes two bowls of food.
He�s completely back to normal.
Weird, huh?
I spent the day with my mother, being as that it was her birthday. She was kinda sad though because it was her 50th birthday and her husband was gone, someone had died, and no one really felt into giving her a big hoopla. I felt badly, but there wasn�t much I could do.
I went to bed early on Saturday and spend Sunday doing my homework, laundry, grocery shopping, and I made a small detour over to R, the Life Floater�s house to watch the Lord of the Rings.
I went to bed and this morning my mom busts into my room fifteen minutes before my alarm is supposed to go off.
�J! Wake up! I need your help!�
I sat up, blankets falling everywhere, the light stinging my eyes. I thought that the house was on fire. I ran and followed her into her room.
It was no fire.
My kitten was sitting on her bed, bucking because he�d gotten his collar stuck in his mouth. The dumbass cat had tried to kick off his collar and succeeded in taking it off halfway, until it was pulled into his mouth like a gag.
�What do I do? Do I just cut it off?�
�No! I paid for that collar, just hold him still, Jesus.�
She held him while I unbuckled the collar and took it off. I refastened it a little tighter so there would be no way that it would get that far up his neck.
I swear, that cat is the smartest cat I�ve ever seen, but he can be so damn stupid sometimes. He�s done that before with his smaller collar. I still don�t get why my mom freaked out though.
Bandit seemed satisfied with the situation and went about his business chasing Cleo and Trouble.
Everyone lived.
