I have to wonder what happened in the men�s bathroom at work that caused it to be completely blocked off by caution tape. Was someone murdered in there? Was there a toilet explosion? Massive amounts of blood all over everything? You can see where my mind is wandering with regard to this mysterious closing. I can only imagine what is going through the minds of the other people employed there.
It has been a very frustrating day.
It has been frustrating in the sense that some stupid issue was brought up over mass email at work and everyone thought it was their patriotic duty to hit �reply all� to share their thoughts and comments with everyone regarding the rogue policy.
I don�t care, in the least, what other people think of a policy. Since I have no interaction with the policy, I read it, say, �Uh huh�, delete it, and go about my daily life. I am now up to 30 individual emails from people with various commentary about it. I don�t know who anyone is. I don�t care. I don�t care what kinds of problems they have with it. Blindly hitting �reply all� does nothing but infuriate those who already have too much email pouring into their boxes as it is.
That being said, is it so complicated to just send a quick note to the instigator of this policy? I thought that the majority of the building that I work at consisted of engineers as it was; what happened to the logic and simple thinking that is our backbone? Idiots!
The other frustrating issue today is that my mom has gone back to being completely psychotic. This wouldn�t be so frustrating if I had the ability to ignore her as everyone so unceremoniously suggests.
I�d love to ignore her. I try not to dwell on her psychosis. However, when you are �not allowed� to retreat from it, it will get to you. It would be like putting someone who is afraid of water in an airtight tank and letting them swim for 16 hours a day. I have no choice but to deal with it, therefore, I will talk about it.
That being said, her newest issue with me is moving my things.
This, of course, is hardly a new issue. She has been doing this ever since I can remember. The thing that really gets to me, however, is that when I ask where she puts my things, she gets all huffy that I�m wasting her time to ask.
Wasting her time to ask? If you don�t want me asking, either 1) put them in a very obvious place per my request [on my bed for example. I won�t miss it there] or 2) don�t touch my stuff. This isn�t a very complicated decision. She wants my things out of her way, pick them up, put them on my bed or in my doorway. That way, I�ll get the opportunity to put them in the place that I want them when I feel like getting to them.
In a matter of less than 48 hours, at least a half-dozen of my things have gone missing. At first, I thought it was sheer coincidence that things started to get misplaced the very moment that my stepfather got back from hunting, but coincidences start to add up. My khaki pants, Alias DVDs, a jacket, shoes, toothbrush [yes, toothbrush], contact solution, lipstick, etc. have all gone missing. At first, my mother told me that it was in my head and that I had put all of these items somewhere while distracted and couldn�t remember where I put them [which could very well be the case]. However, when it comes to the toiletry stuff, I highly doubt it. I brush my teeth twice a day. I brush them in the morning and at night. There are other times when I�ll brush my teeth simply because I want to. I wanted to do just that yesterday evening after taking a shower. Since I had been home in the morning, I had used my toothbrush and put it back on the bathroom counter where I keep it [as opposed to in my overnight bag from being at the wedding]. Somehow, in the span of me going to work, it was lost. The only person home while everyone is at work is my stepfather.
Now�.I don�t know what inspires someone to take someone else�s toothbrush, and I don�t want to know. And quite frankly, if it were found today, I wouldn�t use it. The point that I�m trying to make with this very long and drawn out example is that it is not in my head that it went missing. Why would I take it and move it into any other room? It never goes into any other room. Therefore, that is not �in my head�.
As for the other items, well, I�d just have to assume that since they�re not in any place that I would put anything, that the same issue is going on. I have seen my stepfather pick up my things and either 1) throw them out 2) hide them so that I can�t find them. You don�t believe me? I once caught him taking stuff out of my boxes in the basement and putting them in other parts of the basement. Yes, he is that devious. Yes, he does enjoy pissing people off. I have also caught him opening my credit card bills and throwing them away.
Whether or not he or my mother is responsible for the recent influx of my things going missing is another story. All I want, though, is an explanation as to where my things are and why they were moved. If they were moved because they were in an obnoxious place [such as a toothbrush on a bathroom counter ], I�d like to know so that I refrain from making that mistake in the future and putting myself through this hassle again.
However, this type of logic seems to only infuriate my mother to the point where she makes it a game of �Oh I know where your things are, but I�m not going to tell you.�
You don�t believe me about this one? Oh, believe me, I have an example.
I have this silver heart necklace and matching bracelet. Once, I wore them and took them off in a place and I couldn�t remember where I put them. I looked everywhere for them, finally remembering where I had taken them off at. They were not there.
My mother watched me do this with a smile on her face and said, �I know where they are,� and wouldn�t tell me for a couple of days. She thought that since she bought them for me, and I was careless with them, that I should be punished.
This is what I�m talking about people. I don�t imagine these things. I don�t blow them out of proportion. This is what really happens.
I had myself convinced for the longest time that I was crazy because no sane people act like that. I had myself convinced that I was imagining all of this because no normal people really do these things. I am not crazy, however.
When I just �let things slide� for everyone�s benefit [however, I have yet to see the benefit of letting people get away with such behavior], nothing is ever resolved. In fact, my mother gets angry if I�m not in her face, paying attention to these things. Therefore, I can�t ignore it like I have been told to do.
The point of all of this is that yes, these things happen in my life. Yes, I can�t wait for it to all stop when I finally move out. Yes, I�d love to talk about something else. But [but!] I am frustrated and upset and I�m going to have to get through these frustrations somehow. If you want to help me with that, you�re going to have to [unfortunately] listen to me complain, and help me find ways of getting over it. Whether that involves joking with me, distracting me, or just listening to me, that kind of help is appreciated. Telling me to ignore it and move on, however, is not.
Now, I only hope that I can find that contact lens solution sometime tonight because I�m not really in the mood to run back to the store to keep replacing these items that go missing [especially the khakis or Alias DVDs].
BTW, this is my previous entry from today.
