Alright, I�m back from my little hiatus in upper Michigan. However, I had a very very strange experience last night which has sapped my creative energy so I�m just going to write this in first person. So�on with the director�s commentary: Ah�.New Year�s Eve�.
Before school ended, LL invited a bunch of people up to his cottage for a New Year�s Eve party. Of course I accepted and I found myself on a three hour drive to Higgins lake. I actually arrived a day earlier than everyone else so that I wouldn�t have to get up really early to make it in time for the big game. So, I finally arrived at his cottage and was given the grand tour of an equally grand place complete with four bedrooms, three bathrooms, a pool table, a foosball table, an air hockey table, a ping pong table, and a guest house. After a few hours of mind numbing tv with LL, his brother, his cousin, and his brother�s friend, I retired to my room: a room complete with a fireplace, king sized bed, and a cable tv. The next afternoon LL�s three best high school friends arrived with their girlfriends.
Now, I�m not going to say that this was the best New Year�s I�ve ever had, and I�m not going to say that it was the worst. It was actually very anti-climactic. The whole �new year�s� buildup and mindset actually occurred in the days prior to the big day.
We watched MSU win in the Silicon Valley Classic Bowl or whatever it�s called now and then we started our extravaganza. There were eight of us, not including LL�s brother and his friends, three couples and LL and I. The party was complete with a margarita ball and six hours of entertaining ourselves and getting to know each other. Well, since the guys were so involved in their video games, I only seemed to form opinions of their girlfriends. There was the one that I knew from MSU, a nice blonde girl, and of course�.the raving dramatic drunk (not me this time) who didn�t surprise me when she told me that she was 19. For some odd reason, she reminded me of the 19 year olds that live on my floor at school.
So, New Year�s Eve was basically just another small party to me with a lighted ball drop and three couples kissing while LL and I stared somewhat uncomfortably down at our drinks. Again, it wasn�t the best of times nor was it the worst of times. It sure beat Sterile Whites.
I did decide to come up with a few resolutions:
1) The usual lose weight, get into shape thing but I�m going to turn this into a daily checkup of my feelings and physical self.
2) I�m going to write (not email) my family more.
3) I�m going to take more pictures.
4) And I�m going to try to stop being such a snob.
Now, I�ve looked back on myself over the last year and I am overall pretty happy with my progression as a person. Over the last year I have become independent again, I have started spending more time with my family, I have realized what was most important in my life, I�ve (in one way or another) cleaned the baggage out of my life, and overall, I have grown up. I�m very pleased with the point I am at in my life. I�m not as bipolar and I have learned how to make myself happy without relying on anyone else.
I guess I�ll continue on with my strange experience�.
Last night was a great beginning of a new year. I drove home from Higgins Lake and took a hot bath. I watched an episode of Law and Order and then left to go over to P�s place. He asked me to pick up The Green Mile to watch with him and we settled ourselves cozily in his basement and watched the movie curled up with each other. After the movie (and some other things) we were lying together on the couch, my cheek resting on the warm skin of his chest, his arm draped around my shoulders. He took my hand and held it tightly on his chest.
This is where it gets strange.
I have no idea why I said it (out loud) but I said it, �Pumpkin, I think I still kinda love you.�
He said, �I knew you were going to say that!� in a very soft voice and proceeded to describe to me the exact picture that was in my head. I was stunned, but we continued to experiment with this phenomenon. He asked me to think of something and of course it was hard for me to concentrate on one thought considering my mind goes a mile a minute. I thought of hiking over a mountain and suddenly he said, �Are you thinking of a mountain?�
I was floored.
Then he asked, �Are you thinking of something tall and thin, like a pipe?�
Again, I had been thinking of the water pipe that was in our basement that I had walked into earlier and hit my head on. This went on for awhile in which he got a couple wrong and a few more right. Then he told me to try.
�A pencil?�
Apparently he had been thinking of the pen on his desk that looked like a pencil.
We tried for awhile longer, but we were both too tired to continue and a little while later, I kissed him goodbye and drove home. Right as I arrived outside my door, I got a text message on my phone that had pertained to something we had discussed earlier but the timing of the message was unbelievable.
It was a very strange experience.
