Today has been a weird day. Call it the residual effects of the new hallucinogenic Nyquil that is on the market, or the fact that I feel so far away, but it has definitely been an odd day.
I sat on Hall Road today, tapping my DKNY enclosed toe to the beat of Jonny Lang in my non-offroad Sport Utility Vehicle pondering life. I took a sip of my divinely over-priced specialty coffee and purred with satisfaction. Was the satisfaction due to the fact that I paid $1.50 for a cup of coffee [therefore it must be good] or the fact that it actually did taste good despite its price? I�m not sure that I�ll ever know. As the sun glinted off of my designer sunglasses, I thought of the small pleasures in life that were adding up to a small fortune.
As I was realizing that everything about me at that particular moment screamed GAP COMMERCIAL a light, plastic-y crunch could be heard echoing through my head. My mind snapped back to reality and I saw the sorry remains of a cardboard pumpkin in my rear view mirror. When I looked in front of me, I saw a sea of cardboard pumpkins, making their way toward Lakeside mall through the concrete along the wind-powered tide that lulled them to their destination.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw what resembled a candy cane chasing and scooping up the rogue pumpkins, but when I shook my head and removed my designer frames, I saw that it was only an employee wearing red and white strips, and thus resembling a candy cane.
I stared, numbly, at the situation for a moment, wondering if I was actually still asleep and the acid in the Nyquil was starting to take effect, when I was jolted back by the harsh sound of someone�s car horn. I shrugged my shoulders and tried to avoid another pumpkin, as I watched the teenaged driver behind me, gleefully squash all pumpkins in his path.
I tell you, it was a weird afternoon.
